This season is nothing what I expected, but it is everything that I need. I have never been more broken, but I have also never felt more whole. God has been blowing me away every day with deeper revelation and healing.
In the past month, the Holy Spirit has lovingly touched on areas in my heart that are still in bondage and brought up past wounds. Initially, I attempted to reject the direction of the Lord, however, I knew deep down I was rejecting true freedom and healing. After surrendering my need to seem perfect, I have started walking in greater identity and trust each day. He has taught me the power of vulnerability and transparency. Furthermore, I was never intended to overcome hurts by own strength, but by the power of the Holy Spirit and the power that comes from community.
Grace has been the focus of each day. He took me from understanding the concept of grace to living in and relying on grace. It required for me to abandon my desire to seem all put together and understand that I am only truly put together by the blood of Jesus. He revealed to me that His grace is more powerful that the biggest mistake I could ever make. It is by His grace that I am called holy and righteous. With that said, why would I ever want to resort to grace as my last option? Christ did not make grace His last option, but instead, His first priority.
In this season, the Father has been refining and stretching me by leading me in humility during each step. He has placed me outside of my comfort zone and taught me how to rest at His feet. At times I have felt uncomfortable, but this season has been marked by His beauty, joy and freedom despite my emotions. He has been so faithful every step of the way. On the days I did not want to be transparent, He was faithful to pursuing my heart. Also, on the days I poured my heart out to Him, He was faithful to hold me and tenderly speak to me.
Out of all the ways for the Lord to speak to me, He chose to deposit truth in my heart while I was blow-drying my hair one night. He revealed that He will never hurt my heart and I can fully trust Him. Also, His hands are the safest place for my heart to rest. By understanding I have nothing to fear in His presence, I have encountered deeper moments with Him and have experienced true liberating joy.
Although I never expected or planned this season of life, I have realized Christ has brought me here to add greater joy and impact in my future. It is the wounds and struggles I am overcoming in this season that will later become anointing I carry for other women’s lives. He is birthing freedom within me, so I can disperse freedom in others. Knowing this season has tremendous purpose has brought deeper freedom in my heart. I am so thankful the Lord knows best and sees the hindrances within me that I am unaware of. He is so beautiful and I love being pursued by Him.
If you have hurts and disappointments in your heart, allow the Holy Spirit to speak truth and bring liberty in your life. At times when you feel overwhelmed, lean on His grace to carry you. Be open to the Lord, for His grace and mercy will renew you each day.Also, remember every step you take into deeper freedom not only affects your life, but others you come in contact with. Finally, hear the songs of joy and freedom Christ is singing over you and dwell in those truths.
I pray you are encouraged and the Lord speaks to you and brings deeper freedom in your life!
Thanks for reading! -Allison